I have just finished editing Chapter One for the last time and have decided to go with telling it from Sean's point of view. I kept chopping and changing between narrative, then maybe Elsie, then Sean. I feel the story comes across more intense this way. Have another read and let me know what you think. Thanks to everyone who has encouraged me and taken time out to give me some feedback on my changes. jen x
CHAPTER ONE
Elsie Sheldon tiptoed as she kissed me goodnight. She wasn’t particularly short, 5’ 5 but I was about 6’1, and she loved having to tiptoe to kiss me good night. “You have to go” I said, as I tried to un-wrap my arms from her petite waist. “Just one more kiss Sean” Elsie replied staring at me with her piercing green eyes. Even though they would be together again tomorrow night, I knew she hated going home without me. If only things could be different.
I gave her one last kiss goodnight. When my lips pressed against her soft lips, I knew it sent tingles from her head to her toes. Elsie loved the way I could make her feel. She would tell me her stomach would flutter and she felt like she drifted to a faraway place when I kissed her. Somewhere it was ok for us to be together. We said good night and I watched Elsie as she walked down her road and turned into her drive. She turned and waved goodbye then disappeared into her house. I had to wait here in case anyone from the Sheldon family saw me. That was all that we needed.
I turned and walked back toward the bus stop. For a late September night, London was humid. Uncomfortable. Just as I had felt when I remembered walking into the Sheldon house for the first and last time, four months ago.
I told Elsie that it wasn’t a good idea weeks before that evening. I knew Elsie’s father would not have thought highly of me. No doubt, he would have already done some probing about. Nevertheless, she had insisted that I came along. Marcus Sheldon had shaken my hand when I walked in the house and showed me to the dining room. I was seated next to Jamie, Elsie’s younger brother. Although Jamie was two years younger than Elsie was, he had looked much older than her and resembled their father. I was seated opposite Elsie and felt like my comfort barrier had been taken away by the seating arrangements. I remember feeling tense and my hands were warm and clammy.
Patricia had sat to the left of me. I knew from the moment I saw her that Elsie got her looks from her mother. She had the same long dark, wavy hair and the same piercing green eyes. Patricia had seemed nice enough; it seemed that Elsie also got her good hearted nature from her mother too. Her voice was soft and soothing, like a mother should be. I had thought about my own mother’s voice that night, hers was harsh and angry. Then I had stopped himself drifting back to my own reality and came back to Elsie’s reality, what had seemed like a paradise at that moment.
Jamie was a typical eighteen year old; he had been speaking out of place and pushing his father’s patience since I had arrived. I had felt sure he wouldn’t of got away with it, if I had not of been sitting there. Everything had been going well and when I had looked over at Elsie, she had smiled and almost looked relaxed. I watched her shoulders drop, as she became more comfortable sitting at the table. I had known it would only be a matter of time before that would change. Marcus had started asking questions about the side of town I was raised in. We had been discussing the amount of crime that seemed to go on in East London for almost half hour. Suddenly it was as if someone had pulled the switch and the light bulb came on in Marcus’ head. “Sean, just out of interest may I ask what your last name is?” Marcus had stared deep into my eyes. The look of horror had swept over Elsie’s face and we had both known that was going to be it. The end of our first family night together, the last time we would be allowed to see each other.
“Yes sir, its Bayonne” I had tried to reply calmly. Marcus had just glared at me. “Bayonne. As in Doug Bayonne?” He had asked. “Yes sir” just about managed to leave my mouth. “And are you in any relation TO Doug Bayonne?” Marcus had probed.
I could have lied but it would have been discovered eventually and I had nothing to be ashamed off, I was nothing like him. Elsie had sat there biting her lip and Patricia and Jamie had stopped eating. The ticking off the clock on the wall had seemed to have got louder, until I had realised I was listening to the thudding of my heart against my chest. That was the question I had been waiting for, it was all to be over in less than 2 hours. I had looked down at my plate and breathed in. “Yes Mr Sheldon, he is my father.” Already knowing what lay ahead over those next few minutes, I had finished my mouthful and put the cutlery down onto the table. Silence had fallen across the table, all apart from the shuffling of Marcus’ chair on the wooden floor, as he stood up, pushed his chair back, and had looked at Elsie.
“Dinner is over, Sean has finished” he had turned to look at me. “You are not welcome here and you will not be seeing my daughter again. I will not have my family being associated with the likes of your family. Now leave, please.” I had been left with no choice.
Marcus’ words repeated over and over in my head. The look on Elsie’s face, it was still so visible, even now I could still hear her sobs. Her eyes had filled up and she had gone to stand up from her chair, but her father’s sharp look was enough to make her sit back down. As I had walked out the house, I had heard Elsie’s pleads to her dad. I have not returned to that house since. I had vowed that would not be the last time I saw Elsie again though.
Four months later and we continue to see each other, just more carefully. I couldn’t give her up. I had never felt this way about someone before and never had someone accepted me for who I am, and not who my father was.
I stopped thinking back to that night as I walked through town and boarded the bus back home. I would get home a little after midnight; it was just after 11 now. The journey was long and boring but always worth seeing Elsie. As I stared out into the starry night, I wished I could be with her now. Running my fingers through her soft hair. She would have her arms wrapped around me, as we would cuddle under the duvet talking about our future together. I cared so deeply for Elsie and I knew she loved me. Deep down inside I knew I loved her too, more than I ever thought was possible, but I couldn’t tell her. She would just have to wait to hear those three words.
CHAPTER TWO IS IN THE MAKING, NOW I HAVE DECIDED WHICH CHARACTER TO TELL THE STORY FROM.
Read More......
Monday, 28 September 2009
Sunday, 27 September 2009
Tip Of The Day #1
Trying to juggle more than one job or job idea a day is hard. I know myself having a full time job, how hard it is to come home and sit down to get on with my own work. So over the last few months I have been coming up with ideas to help manage my work load and thought it would be good to share it with anyone else who finds they sometimes feel a bit confused at where to start. Or may even feel that they have so much going round in their head and are finding it hard to get it out onto paper.
After gathering my list together, I am now going to give a Tip Of The Day from now on, which I am hoping will be of some use to you at some point in the near future.
Your 1st tip is going to be
"Carry a note book with you where ever you go/Always have a notebook by your side"
It may sound simple and you may think I already do that but how often do you write in that book and how often do you refer back to it? For the last few months I have been carrying a note book around and it really helps when i am stuck or looking for ideas, to go back and have a scan through of previous ideas I have written down. The best place for my note book is on my desk right next to my bed. The most creative thinking takes place when I am trying to get to sleep. I become indulged in lots of ideas and find that I can't get to sleep, even though i am 95% of the time, shattered! So being able to grab my note book and jot down some ideas is great. They are then taken out of my mind (allowing me to get some sleep)and put on a piece of paper for me to come back to when I am awake and ready to start working.
This doesn't just apply to writers, this works well for many people. Again it may seem obvious but there are times when you are out and about and an idea pops into your head and you have no where to write it down. You say to yourself, 'I must write that down when i get home' (a line we are all familiar with) and no doubt by the time you are home, that idea is a million miles away from the fore front of your mind now!
So my 1st tip is get yourself a good sized notebook, that isn't to much hassle to carry around, and make it your new best friend. Remember to always keep some paper and a pen by your bedside. Its generally a lot of people's most creative time! Look out for tip #2.
Read More......
After gathering my list together, I am now going to give a Tip Of The Day from now on, which I am hoping will be of some use to you at some point in the near future.
Your 1st tip is going to be
"Carry a note book with you where ever you go/Always have a notebook by your side"
It may sound simple and you may think I already do that but how often do you write in that book and how often do you refer back to it? For the last few months I have been carrying a note book around and it really helps when i am stuck or looking for ideas, to go back and have a scan through of previous ideas I have written down. The best place for my note book is on my desk right next to my bed. The most creative thinking takes place when I am trying to get to sleep. I become indulged in lots of ideas and find that I can't get to sleep, even though i am 95% of the time, shattered! So being able to grab my note book and jot down some ideas is great. They are then taken out of my mind (allowing me to get some sleep)and put on a piece of paper for me to come back to when I am awake and ready to start working.
This doesn't just apply to writers, this works well for many people. Again it may seem obvious but there are times when you are out and about and an idea pops into your head and you have no where to write it down. You say to yourself, 'I must write that down when i get home' (a line we are all familiar with) and no doubt by the time you are home, that idea is a million miles away from the fore front of your mind now!
So my 1st tip is get yourself a good sized notebook, that isn't to much hassle to carry around, and make it your new best friend. Remember to always keep some paper and a pen by your bedside. Its generally a lot of people's most creative time! Look out for tip #2.
Read More......
Wednesday, 16 September 2009
Re-edited version of Chapter One
Re-edited version of my first chapter. I have been getting some inspiration and just taken out a course, so i am hoping this has helped with my own editing and made it more professional to read. Have a read and chapter two will be following shortly. Thanks x
Elsie Sheldon tiptoed as she kissed Sean goodnight. She wasn’t particularly short, 5’ 5 but Sean was about 6’1, and she just loved having to tiptoe up to kiss him. “You have to go” Sean said, as he tried to un-wrap his arms from her petite waist. “Just one more kiss” Elsie replied, staring at him with her piercing green eyes. Even though she would be with him again tomorrow night, she hated going home alone, without Sean. If only things could be different.
Sean gave her one last kiss goodnight. When his soft lips touched hers, it sent tingles from her head to her toes. Elsie loved the way Sean made her feel. Her stomach would flutter and she felt like she drifted to a faraway place when he kissed her. Somewhere it was ok for them to be together. They said good night and Sean watched Elsie as she walked down her road and turned into her drive. She turned and waved goodbye then disappeared into her house. He had to wait here in case anyone from the Sheldon family saw him. That was all that Sean and Elsie needed.
Sean turned and walked back toward the bus stop. For a late September night, London was humid. Uncomfortable. Just as he had felt when he remembered walking into the Sheldon house for the first and last time, four months ago...
Sean had told Elsie that it wasn’t a good idea weeks before that evening. He knew Elsie’s father would not have thought highly of him. No doubt he would have already done some probing about on him. Nevertheless, she had insisted that he went. Marcus Sheldon had shook Sean’s hand when he walked in the house and showed him to the dining room. He had been seated next to Jamie, Elsie’s younger brother. Although Jamie was two years younger than Elsie was, he had looked much older than her and resembled their father. Sean was sitting opposite Elsie and felt his comfort barrier had been taken away by the seating arrangements.
Patricia had sat to the left of him. He knew from the moment he saw Patricia, that Elsie got her looks from her mother. She had the same long dark, wavy hair and the same piercing green eyes. Patricia had seemed nice enough; it seemed that Elsie also got her good hearted nature from her mother too. Her voice was soft and soothing, like a mother should be. Sean had thought about his own mother’s voice that night, hers was harsh and angry. Then he had stopped himself drifting back to his own reality and came back to Elsie’s reality, what had seemed like a paradise to him.
Jamie was a typical eighteen year old; he had been speaking out of place and pushing his father’s patience since Sean had arrived. He had felt sure he wouldn’t of got away with it, if he had not of been sitting there. Everything had been going well and when Sean looked over at Elsie, she had smiled and almost looked relaxed. Sean had known it would only be a matter of time before that would change. Marcus had started asking questions about the side of town Sean was raised in. They had been discussing the amount of crime that seemed to go on in East London for almost half hour. Suddenly it was as if someone had pulled the switch and the light bulb came on in Marcus’ head. “Sean, just out of interest may I ask what your last name is?” Marcus had stared deep into Sean’s eyes. The look of horror had swept over Elsie’s face and they had both known that was going to be it. The end of their first family night together, the last time they would be allowed to see each other.
“Yes sir, its Bayonne” Sean had replied, calmly. Marcus had just glared at Sean. “Bayonne. As in Doug Bayonne?” He had asked. “Yes sir” just managed to leave Sean’s mouth. “And are you in any relation TO Doug Bayonne?” Marcus had probed.
He could have lied but it would have been discovered eventually and he had nothing to be ashamed off, Sean was nothing like him. Elsie had sat there biting her lip and Patricia and Jamie had stopped eating. The ticking off the clock on the wall had seemed to have got louder, until Sean had realised he was listening to the thudding of his own heart against his chest. That was the question he had been waiting for, it was all to be over in less than 2 hours. Sean breathed in and answered before Marcus could repeat his question. “Yes Mr Sheldon, he is my father.” Already knowing what lay ahead over the next few minutes Sean finished his mouthful and put his cutlery down. Silence had fallen across the table, all apart from the shuffling of Marcus’ chair on the wooden floor, as he stood up, pushed his chair back, and looked at Elsie.
“Dinner is over, Sean has finished” he had turned to look at me. “You are not welcome here and you will not be seeing my daughter again. I will not have my family being associated with the likes of your family. Now leave, please.” He had been left with no choice.
Marcus’ words repeated over and over in his head. The look on Elsie’s face, it was still so visible, even now he could still hear her sobs. Her eyes had whelmed up and she had gone to stand up from her chair, but her father’s sharp look was enough to make her sit back down. As Sean had walked out the house, he had heard Elsie’s sobs and pleads to her dad. He has not returned to that house since. Sean had vowed that would not be the last time he saw Elsie again though.
Four months later and they continue to see each other, just more carefully. Sean couldn’t give her up. He had never felt this way about someone before and never had someone accepted him for who he is, and not who his father was.
Sean stopped thinking back to that night and boarded the bus back to his side of town. He would get home a little after midnight; it was just after 11 now. As he stared out into the starry night, he wished he could be with Elsie now. Running his fingers through her soft hair. She would have her arms wrapped around him, as they would cuddle under the duvet talking about their future together. He cared deeply for Elsie and he knew she loved him. Deep down inside he knew he loved her too, more than he ever thought was possible, but he couldn’t tell her. Elsie would just have to wait to hear those three words.
Read More......
Elsie Sheldon tiptoed as she kissed Sean goodnight. She wasn’t particularly short, 5’ 5 but Sean was about 6’1, and she just loved having to tiptoe up to kiss him. “You have to go” Sean said, as he tried to un-wrap his arms from her petite waist. “Just one more kiss” Elsie replied, staring at him with her piercing green eyes. Even though she would be with him again tomorrow night, she hated going home alone, without Sean. If only things could be different.
Sean gave her one last kiss goodnight. When his soft lips touched hers, it sent tingles from her head to her toes. Elsie loved the way Sean made her feel. Her stomach would flutter and she felt like she drifted to a faraway place when he kissed her. Somewhere it was ok for them to be together. They said good night and Sean watched Elsie as she walked down her road and turned into her drive. She turned and waved goodbye then disappeared into her house. He had to wait here in case anyone from the Sheldon family saw him. That was all that Sean and Elsie needed.
Sean turned and walked back toward the bus stop. For a late September night, London was humid. Uncomfortable. Just as he had felt when he remembered walking into the Sheldon house for the first and last time, four months ago...
Sean had told Elsie that it wasn’t a good idea weeks before that evening. He knew Elsie’s father would not have thought highly of him. No doubt he would have already done some probing about on him. Nevertheless, she had insisted that he went. Marcus Sheldon had shook Sean’s hand when he walked in the house and showed him to the dining room. He had been seated next to Jamie, Elsie’s younger brother. Although Jamie was two years younger than Elsie was, he had looked much older than her and resembled their father. Sean was sitting opposite Elsie and felt his comfort barrier had been taken away by the seating arrangements.
Patricia had sat to the left of him. He knew from the moment he saw Patricia, that Elsie got her looks from her mother. She had the same long dark, wavy hair and the same piercing green eyes. Patricia had seemed nice enough; it seemed that Elsie also got her good hearted nature from her mother too. Her voice was soft and soothing, like a mother should be. Sean had thought about his own mother’s voice that night, hers was harsh and angry. Then he had stopped himself drifting back to his own reality and came back to Elsie’s reality, what had seemed like a paradise to him.
Jamie was a typical eighteen year old; he had been speaking out of place and pushing his father’s patience since Sean had arrived. He had felt sure he wouldn’t of got away with it, if he had not of been sitting there. Everything had been going well and when Sean looked over at Elsie, she had smiled and almost looked relaxed. Sean had known it would only be a matter of time before that would change. Marcus had started asking questions about the side of town Sean was raised in. They had been discussing the amount of crime that seemed to go on in East London for almost half hour. Suddenly it was as if someone had pulled the switch and the light bulb came on in Marcus’ head. “Sean, just out of interest may I ask what your last name is?” Marcus had stared deep into Sean’s eyes. The look of horror had swept over Elsie’s face and they had both known that was going to be it. The end of their first family night together, the last time they would be allowed to see each other.
“Yes sir, its Bayonne” Sean had replied, calmly. Marcus had just glared at Sean. “Bayonne. As in Doug Bayonne?” He had asked. “Yes sir” just managed to leave Sean’s mouth. “And are you in any relation TO Doug Bayonne?” Marcus had probed.
He could have lied but it would have been discovered eventually and he had nothing to be ashamed off, Sean was nothing like him. Elsie had sat there biting her lip and Patricia and Jamie had stopped eating. The ticking off the clock on the wall had seemed to have got louder, until Sean had realised he was listening to the thudding of his own heart against his chest. That was the question he had been waiting for, it was all to be over in less than 2 hours. Sean breathed in and answered before Marcus could repeat his question. “Yes Mr Sheldon, he is my father.” Already knowing what lay ahead over the next few minutes Sean finished his mouthful and put his cutlery down. Silence had fallen across the table, all apart from the shuffling of Marcus’ chair on the wooden floor, as he stood up, pushed his chair back, and looked at Elsie.
“Dinner is over, Sean has finished” he had turned to look at me. “You are not welcome here and you will not be seeing my daughter again. I will not have my family being associated with the likes of your family. Now leave, please.” He had been left with no choice.
Marcus’ words repeated over and over in his head. The look on Elsie’s face, it was still so visible, even now he could still hear her sobs. Her eyes had whelmed up and she had gone to stand up from her chair, but her father’s sharp look was enough to make her sit back down. As Sean had walked out the house, he had heard Elsie’s sobs and pleads to her dad. He has not returned to that house since. Sean had vowed that would not be the last time he saw Elsie again though.
Four months later and they continue to see each other, just more carefully. Sean couldn’t give her up. He had never felt this way about someone before and never had someone accepted him for who he is, and not who his father was.
Sean stopped thinking back to that night and boarded the bus back to his side of town. He would get home a little after midnight; it was just after 11 now. As he stared out into the starry night, he wished he could be with Elsie now. Running his fingers through her soft hair. She would have her arms wrapped around him, as they would cuddle under the duvet talking about their future together. He cared deeply for Elsie and he knew she loved him. Deep down inside he knew he loved her too, more than he ever thought was possible, but he couldn’t tell her. Elsie would just have to wait to hear those three words.
Read More......
Wednesday, 5 August 2009
Idea's on a location for my first attempt of a novel?
I HAVE BEEN WORKING ON WRITING A NOVEL FOR A PERIOD OF TIME NOW AND HAVE JUST RE-EDITED IT BUT AM YET TO COME UP WITH A SUITABLE LOCATION. PLEASE READ AND LEAVE COMMENTS AT THE BOTTOM FOR SUGGESTED LOCATIONS OR GENERAL COMMENTS ON MY FIRST PIECE. ANY FEEDBACK IS GREAT. MANY THANKS JEN X
CHAPTER ONE
Elsie Sheldon tiptoed as she kissed Sean goodnight. She wasn’t’t particularly short, 5’ 5 but Sean was about 6’1, and she just loved having to tiptoe to kiss him. “You have to go” Sean said, as he tried to un-wrap his arms from her petite waist. “Just one more kiss” Elsie replied, staring at him with her piercing green eyes. Even though she would be with him again tomorrow night, she hated going home alone, without Sean. If only things could be different.
Sean gave her one last kiss goodnight. When his soft lips touched hers, it sent tingles from her head to her toes. Elsie loved the way Sean made her feel. Her stomach would flutter and she felt like she drifted to a faraway place when he kissed her. Somewhere it was ok for them to be together. They said good night and Sean watched Elsie as she walked down her road and turned into her drive. She turned and waved goodbye then disappeared into her house. He had to wait here in case anyone from the Sheldon family saw him. That was all that Sean and Elsie needed.
Sean turned and walked back toward the bus stop. For a late September night, (location) was hot, humid. Uncomfortable. Just as he had felt when he remembered walking into the Sheldon house for the first and last time, four months ago.
Sean had told Elsie that it wasn’t a good idea weeks before that evening. He knew Elsie’s father would not have thought highly off him, he would have done some probing about on him. Nevertheless, she had insisted that he went. Marcus Sheldon had shook Sean’s hand when he walked in the house and showed him to the dining room. He had been seated next to Jamie, Elsie’s younger brother. Although Jamie was two years younger than Elsie was, he had looked much older than her and resembled their father. Sean was sitting opposite Elsie and felt his comfort barrier had been taken away by the seating arrangements.
Patricia had sat to the left of him. He knew from the moment he saw Patricia, that Elsie got her looks from her mother. She had the same long dark, wavy hair and the same piercing green eyes. You could tell from their golden brown skin, that they both took time out to lounge round their pool, topping up their tans. Patricia had seemed nice enough; it seemed that Elsie also got her good hearted nature from her mother too. Her voice was soft and soothing, like a mother should be. Sean had thought about his own mother’s voice that night, hers was harsh and angry. Then he had stopped himself drifting back to his own reality and came back to Elsie’s reality, what had seemed like a paradise to him.
Jamie was a typical eighteen year old; he had been speaking out of place and pushing his father’s patience since I had arrived. I was sure he wouldn’t’t of got away with it, if I had not of been sitting there. Everything was going well and when I looked over at Elsie, she had smiled and I had seen her shoulders relax. But I had known it would only be a matter of time before that would change. Marcus had started asking questions about the side of town I had been bought up in. We had been discussing the danger and crime from (location)for almost half hour, and then it was like I had seen someone pull the switch and the light bulb came on in Marcus’ head. “Sean, may I ask what your last name is?” Marcus had stared deep into Sean’s eyes. The look of horror had swept over Elsie’s face and we had both known that was going to be it. The end of our first family night together, the last time we would be allowed to see each other.
“Yes sir, its Bayonne” I had replied, calmly. Marcus had just glared at Sean. “Bayonne. As in Doug Bayonne?” He had asked. “Yes sir” I had answered. “And are you in any relation TO Doug Bayonne?” Marcus had probed.
I could have lied but it would have been discovered eventually and I had nothing to be ashamed off, I was nothing like him. I remember Elsie biting her lip and Patricia and Jamie had stopped eating. The ticking of the clock on the wall had seemed to have got louder, until I had realised it was my heart thudding against my chest. That was the question I had been waiting for, it was all to be over in less than 2 hours. I breathed in and answered before Marcus could repeat his question. “Yes Mr Sheldon, he is my father” I had replied, knowing what lay ahead over the next few minutes. I had finished my mouthful and put the cutlery down. Silence had fallen across the table, all apart from the shuffling of Marcus’ chair on the wooden floor, as he stood up, pushed his chair back, and looked at Elsie.
“Dinner is over, Sean has finished” he had turned to look at me. “You are not welcome here and you will not be seeing my daughter again. Do you understand? I will not have my family being associated with the likes of your family. Now leave, please.”
Marcus’ words repeated over and over in my head. The look on Elsie’s face, I could still see it now, I could still hear her sobs. Her eyes had whelmed up and she had gone to stand up from her chair, when her father’s sharp look was enough to make her sit back down. As I had walked out the house, I could hear Elsie’s sobs and pleads to her dad. I have not returned to that house since. I had vowed that would not be the last time I saw Elsie again though.
Four months later and I continue to see Elsie, just more carefully. I couldn’t give her up. I have never felt this way about someone before and never had someone accepted me for who I am, and not who my father was.
I stopped thinking back to that night and boarded the bus back to my side of town. I would be home a little after midnight; it was just after 11 now. As I stared out into the starry night, I wished I could be with Elsie now. Running my fingers through her soft hair. She would have her arms wrapped around me, as we snuggled under our duvet talking about our future together. I cared deeply for Elsie. I knew she loved me and deep down inside I knew I loved her too, more than I ever thought was possible, but I couldn’t tell her. She would just have to wait for those three words. Read More......
CHAPTER ONE
Elsie Sheldon tiptoed as she kissed Sean goodnight. She wasn’t’t particularly short, 5’ 5 but Sean was about 6’1, and she just loved having to tiptoe to kiss him. “You have to go” Sean said, as he tried to un-wrap his arms from her petite waist. “Just one more kiss” Elsie replied, staring at him with her piercing green eyes. Even though she would be with him again tomorrow night, she hated going home alone, without Sean. If only things could be different.
Sean gave her one last kiss goodnight. When his soft lips touched hers, it sent tingles from her head to her toes. Elsie loved the way Sean made her feel. Her stomach would flutter and she felt like she drifted to a faraway place when he kissed her. Somewhere it was ok for them to be together. They said good night and Sean watched Elsie as she walked down her road and turned into her drive. She turned and waved goodbye then disappeared into her house. He had to wait here in case anyone from the Sheldon family saw him. That was all that Sean and Elsie needed.
Sean turned and walked back toward the bus stop. For a late September night, (location) was hot, humid. Uncomfortable. Just as he had felt when he remembered walking into the Sheldon house for the first and last time, four months ago.
Sean had told Elsie that it wasn’t a good idea weeks before that evening. He knew Elsie’s father would not have thought highly off him, he would have done some probing about on him. Nevertheless, she had insisted that he went. Marcus Sheldon had shook Sean’s hand when he walked in the house and showed him to the dining room. He had been seated next to Jamie, Elsie’s younger brother. Although Jamie was two years younger than Elsie was, he had looked much older than her and resembled their father. Sean was sitting opposite Elsie and felt his comfort barrier had been taken away by the seating arrangements.
Patricia had sat to the left of him. He knew from the moment he saw Patricia, that Elsie got her looks from her mother. She had the same long dark, wavy hair and the same piercing green eyes. You could tell from their golden brown skin, that they both took time out to lounge round their pool, topping up their tans. Patricia had seemed nice enough; it seemed that Elsie also got her good hearted nature from her mother too. Her voice was soft and soothing, like a mother should be. Sean had thought about his own mother’s voice that night, hers was harsh and angry. Then he had stopped himself drifting back to his own reality and came back to Elsie’s reality, what had seemed like a paradise to him.
Jamie was a typical eighteen year old; he had been speaking out of place and pushing his father’s patience since I had arrived. I was sure he wouldn’t’t of got away with it, if I had not of been sitting there. Everything was going well and when I looked over at Elsie, she had smiled and I had seen her shoulders relax. But I had known it would only be a matter of time before that would change. Marcus had started asking questions about the side of town I had been bought up in. We had been discussing the danger and crime from (location)for almost half hour, and then it was like I had seen someone pull the switch and the light bulb came on in Marcus’ head. “Sean, may I ask what your last name is?” Marcus had stared deep into Sean’s eyes. The look of horror had swept over Elsie’s face and we had both known that was going to be it. The end of our first family night together, the last time we would be allowed to see each other.
“Yes sir, its Bayonne” I had replied, calmly. Marcus had just glared at Sean. “Bayonne. As in Doug Bayonne?” He had asked. “Yes sir” I had answered. “And are you in any relation TO Doug Bayonne?” Marcus had probed.
I could have lied but it would have been discovered eventually and I had nothing to be ashamed off, I was nothing like him. I remember Elsie biting her lip and Patricia and Jamie had stopped eating. The ticking of the clock on the wall had seemed to have got louder, until I had realised it was my heart thudding against my chest. That was the question I had been waiting for, it was all to be over in less than 2 hours. I breathed in and answered before Marcus could repeat his question. “Yes Mr Sheldon, he is my father” I had replied, knowing what lay ahead over the next few minutes. I had finished my mouthful and put the cutlery down. Silence had fallen across the table, all apart from the shuffling of Marcus’ chair on the wooden floor, as he stood up, pushed his chair back, and looked at Elsie.
“Dinner is over, Sean has finished” he had turned to look at me. “You are not welcome here and you will not be seeing my daughter again. Do you understand? I will not have my family being associated with the likes of your family. Now leave, please.”
Marcus’ words repeated over and over in my head. The look on Elsie’s face, I could still see it now, I could still hear her sobs. Her eyes had whelmed up and she had gone to stand up from her chair, when her father’s sharp look was enough to make her sit back down. As I had walked out the house, I could hear Elsie’s sobs and pleads to her dad. I have not returned to that house since. I had vowed that would not be the last time I saw Elsie again though.
Four months later and I continue to see Elsie, just more carefully. I couldn’t give her up. I have never felt this way about someone before and never had someone accepted me for who I am, and not who my father was.
I stopped thinking back to that night and boarded the bus back to my side of town. I would be home a little after midnight; it was just after 11 now. As I stared out into the starry night, I wished I could be with Elsie now. Running my fingers through her soft hair. She would have her arms wrapped around me, as we snuggled under our duvet talking about our future together. I cared deeply for Elsie. I knew she loved me and deep down inside I knew I loved her too, more than I ever thought was possible, but I couldn’t tell her. She would just have to wait for those three words. Read More......
Thursday, 30 July 2009
The power of words.... 5 minute exercise
When do we realise we have said something we shouldn’t have? When we see somebody else’s reaction?
When do we know something we have said won’t ever be forgotten? By the shimmer in someone’s eyes when they look into yours?
When do we say sorry but realise it’s too late? By the empty expression on the other persons face?
How often do we go to say something and stop ourselves? Not often enough otherwise we wouldn’t need to say sorry.
How often do we think about how our words are going to make somebody feel? Normally once we have already said them.
How often do we take time out to tell someone we love them and how much they mean to us? We think about it but don’t normally get round to telling someone.
Words are so powerful and can have a huge impact on somebody. We use words every single day to string sentences together. Whether we say them out loud or just think them. But we don’t always think about what we say.
Take a 5 minute break and complete this simple exercise for yourself. Write down a sentence or word which somebody said to you today, which had an impact on you. Do you think they realised how that impacted on you?
Now write down a sentence or word which you said to somebody today and how you think that affected them. If you can’t think of one, ask somebody you had contact with today and see what result you get. I can nearly guarantee that you were unaware of how this affected someone.
This is just a short exercise to bring more awareness to people. Awareness to the power of the words you use and the effects they have on people. If you carry out the exercise, feel free to share your findings in the comments box below.
Read More......
When do we know something we have said won’t ever be forgotten? By the shimmer in someone’s eyes when they look into yours?
When do we say sorry but realise it’s too late? By the empty expression on the other persons face?
How often do we go to say something and stop ourselves? Not often enough otherwise we wouldn’t need to say sorry.
How often do we think about how our words are going to make somebody feel? Normally once we have already said them.
How often do we take time out to tell someone we love them and how much they mean to us? We think about it but don’t normally get round to telling someone.
Words are so powerful and can have a huge impact on somebody. We use words every single day to string sentences together. Whether we say them out loud or just think them. But we don’t always think about what we say.
Take a 5 minute break and complete this simple exercise for yourself. Write down a sentence or word which somebody said to you today, which had an impact on you. Do you think they realised how that impacted on you?
Now write down a sentence or word which you said to somebody today and how you think that affected them. If you can’t think of one, ask somebody you had contact with today and see what result you get. I can nearly guarantee that you were unaware of how this affected someone.
This is just a short exercise to bring more awareness to people. Awareness to the power of the words you use and the effects they have on people. If you carry out the exercise, feel free to share your findings in the comments box below.
Read More......
Tuesday, 28 July 2009
Restaurant Review
Location: Corner of Union Street/Ship Street, BRIGHTON
Restaurant: Italian Restaurant (opposite a lovely jewellers; Michael Rose)
Rating: Cleanliness: * Food: * Service: * Presentation: *
4 out of a possible 20!
As it was recently my birthday, my partner and I decided to spend a day out at our favourite place, Brighton. After a lovely morning walking around, we both got quite hungry and set out to find a nice restaurant to have lunch. As Italian food is my favourite, we picked what appeared to be a nice Italian pizza/pasta restaurant to eat in. We eat out a lot; it’s probably our favourite thing to do, at least twice a week. So we have a fair bit of experience on restaurant standards.
We went inside and asked to be seated outside along the lanes as it was a beautiful day. We walked out to the table and were handed our menus straight away. We were then approached to order our drinks. My partner ordered a low alcohol beer and myself lemonade. Whilst waiting for our drinks, we were approached by a further 2 waiters asking to take our drinks order! I soon realised there was no organisation in what tables belonged to what waiters. We ordered our food, whilst waiting for our drinks. The service was extremely rushed and felt like we were a burden on the staff. Although they had more than enough staff and the restaurant was only half full.
When we received our drinks, my partner was not given a low alcohol beer and when he asked the waiter, he replied “we don’t have any of them left”. It would have been polite to double check what he wanted to drink instead of assuming. My lemonade came in a glass with what can only be described as tomato pizza sauce, down the side of the glass and inside the top of the glass.
I wiped it down and tried to drink it but after battling with myself, pushed it to the side and waited for my partner to finish with his glass, so I could change it over.
I expected the table to be wiped over before we were served our lunch, it was not. I also hoped they would remove the cutlery from beside us that we were not using, as the fork sitting next to me quite visibly had a rather long hair wrapped between its prongs. Trying not to think of what my food was being cooked in, I hoped it would hurry up before I changed my mind and left. A different waiter brought over two plates, which had neither of what we ordered on it, so he took them away, after questioning if we were sure that wasn't what we had ordered! The lasagne I was waiting for definitely doesn’t look like the pizza they tried to give me!
We finally got our food. My partner ordered Bolognaise Tortellini, although it did not state on the menu what was inside the tortellini and we could not work it out through personal taste. The presentation was quite simple; on a clean plate (which is always nice!) my partner described his meal as ‘bland, undercooked grisly meat, the sauce tasteless. The little bit of veg that was actually on his plate was what added taste to the meal. In general the meal just tasted wet and soft’.
I had ordered the lasagne. It was presented in a dish, which it had obviously been cooked in. The outside of the dish and under the handles was black from where it had been warmed up – this could have easily been cleaned up. I was hoping the taste of the meal was going to make up for poor service and presentation. However when I took a bite of my lasagne I was not impressed. It tasted like pizza that had been reheated after it had been sitting out for a day. The cheese on the lasagne was so think and actually tasted like pizza cheese. The meat didn’t have any taste to it and the whole meal just tasted like it had been reheated more than once. I managed to eat a few mouthfuls and then pushed it to the side to be left with my empty, dirty lemonade glass.
Whilst waiting for our plates to be cleared, we asked for the bill. The meal came to around £15. Another waiter then whipped the serviettes out from under the two sets of un-used cutlery on our table and handed them to another customer. Leaving the cutlery with the hair on it lying on a dirty table. Ready for the next customers to sit down.
I have eaten in many restaurants and can honestly say this was the worst I have visited. Normally if a restaurant lacks in one department, it makes up for it in another, but this restaurant lacked in service, quality food, cleanliness and presentation. Intrigued, I came home to visit the webpage to see how they portray themselves but was unable to track any website down. This may be due to the name of the restaurant varying on search engines from Picasso's to Piccolo's!
Overall both my partner and I were very disappointed with the restaurant, so much so that I thought I would share this review with others. If you have visited the restaurant, feel free to add your opinion on the bottom.
Read More......
Saturday, 4 April 2009
Did you see it?
After tossing and turning in my bed. I wake up properly, my skin is clammy and I feel dazed. Looking at my phone, I realise it is only 01:00. I can’t remember what I was dreaming about but I woke up startled. Sitting up, I reach for the glass of water beside my bed. I can hear something. It sounds like something moving around in the room below me. Who would be in the dining room at this time? I sit there listening intently and hear nothing more, so curl back up in bed and close my eyes. I feel as though I am slowly falling back into a sleep when breathing in, I can taste something, smell something I don’t recognise.
I sit back up to find my bedroom is a little bit misty. I rub my eyes. Am I still asleep? I step out of bed and walk towards my bedroom door to see what is going on. Opening my bedroom door and walking out onto the landing, I lean over the banister to see that a light is shining from underneath the back room door. I am definitely awake. Curious I walk downstairs. The strong smell becoming over powering. I am rapidly finding it hard to breathe. I get to the backroom door and in a split second before I try to open it, I realise what is going on. I run back upstairs.
I run into my mum and dad’s room, shouting that there is a fire downstairs, to realise that nobody is there. I call out to my brother and no reply. I run into his bedroom and he is asleep. Shouting, panicking, screaming I manage to wake him. He just stares at me. What the hell is going on? Where are mum and dad? And why is my brother not getting up? I run back into my parent’s room and then into mine to check they are not there.
I turn on the lights and run downstairs, the fire is spreading and now in my kitchen, making its way along the hall. I can barely see around the ground floor of my house, the smoke is so thick and I can only be in it so long before I can feel myself becoming light headed. I push against the front room door, realising it is ajar. My mum and dad are asleep on the couch.
I start shouting at them and pulling them to get up but nobody is moving. How long have they been down here inhaling the fumes? Were they already asleep or has this put them to sleep? I have to go back upstairs, I need my phone to call for help, and I need my brother. Running back upstairs, I am screaming and shouting. The front door is locked and my keys are also in my bedroom. Rummaging around I find everything I need.
I call 999. I find my keys. I run into my brother’s room. He's not there anymore? I search around, calling for him. No sign. I check out my parent’s room, he is not there either. The fire has come up the stairs. It didn’t take long. My parents are down there. Are they ok? I can barely see through the smoke and my tears. I just need some air, fresh air. Something that is going to get me through trying to get back downstairs to my parents.
I get to a window, I can’t get it open. It’s jammed. I look outside. The fire brigade is here and my mum, dad and brother are outside on stretchers. They are being lifted into the ambulances. All the neighbours are gathering to watch my house burn down. Why is no one coming for me? Does anyone know I’m in here?
I scream for help. I can’t go back out this room, I can’t get downstairs. The fire is ripping through my house so quickly. I am going to die if I stay here. I can’t see a way out, I panic. I draw open my parents curtains. I walk to the back of the room. I take a deep breath in. I am panicking but there is no other way out. At least I have a chance of surviving this way. I don’t have double glazing, I can make it. I start running; it feels like I am running forever but my parents room is not that big. I take a leap into the air and smash through the window. Everybody looks up and gasps. I am falling and falling. I can see the ground getting closer and closer. The drop is bigger than I thought it was. I am just about to hit the ground, when I wake up.
How often have you had a dream where you are falling and you wake up just before you hit the ground? I know it’s a dream I have had on more than one occasion and asking around, other people have too. I have done quite a bit of research into this and there is no set answer for what happens when we do this. One answer is that your brain disengages from your body when you’re sleeping which prevents you from moving around in your sleep too much. You generally have the feeling of falling when you are close to waking up, which is caused by your brain sending out a reflex twitch. This causes you to jump from the falling and awake. Other people believe that it is your body dragging you back into it, as you become free from your body whilst having these dreams. There seems to be no real explanation for this feeling though?
Waking up in the middle of the night from a nightmare is scary for anybody. It is dark and it takes a little while to adjust back to reality and fully awake. Everything always seems so real. We all have them, some more than others, some worse than others. There are two types of nightmares. There are actual Nightmares and something which is known as Night terrors.
Night terrors being more emotional and creating a much bigger fear than nightmares. These are when we awake petrified and sometimes completely unaware of what is going on. When we wake we can sometimes recall every part of what happened. Other times we have no idea what happened whilst we were sleeping. We just awake with rapid heartbeat and the strongest feeling of fear. These generally appear in the first half of the night, with the person waking up screaming, crying, gasping for air. Although we have no definite reason for causes of these, the most common is emotional tension and stress.
A nightmare usually appears later on through the night and usually wakes you from your sleep but you are able to recall the content of the dream. Nightmares are very common in children and decrease in adulthood. Although, apparently 50% of adults experience nightmares, women more often than men. A few causes of nightmares could be, eating before going to bed, this increases the body’s metabolism and the brains activity. Illness, anxiety and stress are also common causes. Having a clear head when you go to sleep is going to help reduce the chances of nightmares.
It is something which when we all go to bed, we cannot prevent from happening. Watching a horror film before bed is more likely to cause them. So pick your TV channel wisely before you go to bed and Sleep well!
Read More......
I sit back up to find my bedroom is a little bit misty. I rub my eyes. Am I still asleep? I step out of bed and walk towards my bedroom door to see what is going on. Opening my bedroom door and walking out onto the landing, I lean over the banister to see that a light is shining from underneath the back room door. I am definitely awake. Curious I walk downstairs. The strong smell becoming over powering. I am rapidly finding it hard to breathe. I get to the backroom door and in a split second before I try to open it, I realise what is going on. I run back upstairs.
I run into my mum and dad’s room, shouting that there is a fire downstairs, to realise that nobody is there. I call out to my brother and no reply. I run into his bedroom and he is asleep. Shouting, panicking, screaming I manage to wake him. He just stares at me. What the hell is going on? Where are mum and dad? And why is my brother not getting up? I run back into my parent’s room and then into mine to check they are not there.
I turn on the lights and run downstairs, the fire is spreading and now in my kitchen, making its way along the hall. I can barely see around the ground floor of my house, the smoke is so thick and I can only be in it so long before I can feel myself becoming light headed. I push against the front room door, realising it is ajar. My mum and dad are asleep on the couch.
I start shouting at them and pulling them to get up but nobody is moving. How long have they been down here inhaling the fumes? Were they already asleep or has this put them to sleep? I have to go back upstairs, I need my phone to call for help, and I need my brother. Running back upstairs, I am screaming and shouting. The front door is locked and my keys are also in my bedroom. Rummaging around I find everything I need.
I call 999. I find my keys. I run into my brother’s room. He's not there anymore? I search around, calling for him. No sign. I check out my parent’s room, he is not there either. The fire has come up the stairs. It didn’t take long. My parents are down there. Are they ok? I can barely see through the smoke and my tears. I just need some air, fresh air. Something that is going to get me through trying to get back downstairs to my parents.
I get to a window, I can’t get it open. It’s jammed. I look outside. The fire brigade is here and my mum, dad and brother are outside on stretchers. They are being lifted into the ambulances. All the neighbours are gathering to watch my house burn down. Why is no one coming for me? Does anyone know I’m in here?
I scream for help. I can’t go back out this room, I can’t get downstairs. The fire is ripping through my house so quickly. I am going to die if I stay here. I can’t see a way out, I panic. I draw open my parents curtains. I walk to the back of the room. I take a deep breath in. I am panicking but there is no other way out. At least I have a chance of surviving this way. I don’t have double glazing, I can make it. I start running; it feels like I am running forever but my parents room is not that big. I take a leap into the air and smash through the window. Everybody looks up and gasps. I am falling and falling. I can see the ground getting closer and closer. The drop is bigger than I thought it was. I am just about to hit the ground, when I wake up.
How often have you had a dream where you are falling and you wake up just before you hit the ground? I know it’s a dream I have had on more than one occasion and asking around, other people have too. I have done quite a bit of research into this and there is no set answer for what happens when we do this. One answer is that your brain disengages from your body when you’re sleeping which prevents you from moving around in your sleep too much. You generally have the feeling of falling when you are close to waking up, which is caused by your brain sending out a reflex twitch. This causes you to jump from the falling and awake. Other people believe that it is your body dragging you back into it, as you become free from your body whilst having these dreams. There seems to be no real explanation for this feeling though?
Waking up in the middle of the night from a nightmare is scary for anybody. It is dark and it takes a little while to adjust back to reality and fully awake. Everything always seems so real. We all have them, some more than others, some worse than others. There are two types of nightmares. There are actual Nightmares and something which is known as Night terrors.
Night terrors being more emotional and creating a much bigger fear than nightmares. These are when we awake petrified and sometimes completely unaware of what is going on. When we wake we can sometimes recall every part of what happened. Other times we have no idea what happened whilst we were sleeping. We just awake with rapid heartbeat and the strongest feeling of fear. These generally appear in the first half of the night, with the person waking up screaming, crying, gasping for air. Although we have no definite reason for causes of these, the most common is emotional tension and stress.
A nightmare usually appears later on through the night and usually wakes you from your sleep but you are able to recall the content of the dream. Nightmares are very common in children and decrease in adulthood. Although, apparently 50% of adults experience nightmares, women more often than men. A few causes of nightmares could be, eating before going to bed, this increases the body’s metabolism and the brains activity. Illness, anxiety and stress are also common causes. Having a clear head when you go to sleep is going to help reduce the chances of nightmares.
It is something which when we all go to bed, we cannot prevent from happening. Watching a horror film before bed is more likely to cause them. So pick your TV channel wisely before you go to bed and Sleep well!
Read More......
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